After all that, today was pretty crappy.
I spent most of it alone, worrying that people were staring at me for wearing a skirt and heels and having a lower-than-usual cut top on. I'm not insecure, just paranoid. I felt really good about myself when I put together this outfit this morning and I felt ridiculous by the end of the day.
Then I had to walk all the way home because I forgot my change for the bus.
Money stresses really got to me today aswell. I can't afford anything at the moment let alone a school trip abroad, a holiday with my boyfriend, a holiday with friends and a holiday with family. And the school trip I don't think I have a chance of getting out of at the minute, unless I get hit by a bus or something. Plus I'd be going without any of my friends - worst week ever?
It's horrible to think that nothing can ever get done without a wad of twenties in your purse.
And now I'm going to see my grandparents who were both in hospital this week with heart problems - angina and a possible heart attack. Get a pack of tissues ready because no doubt this soppy thing will need them.
Today I've learnt that money = life.
x
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It's sad that you've been made to feel that way, but you have no need to feel ridiculous, you only look elegant in your heels and skirts, nothing less.
ReplyDeleteMoney unfortunately does pay a big part in life but at the same time, there's nothing you can do about it, I'd rather be skint than debt ridden any day. Your family doesn't expect you to pay on holiday and neither would I. Not because we feel sorry for you but because we love you and not because we have to but because we want to.
This won't suddenly alleviate your bad thoughts but I hope you consider this when you feel bad.
Thursday both ways is fine by the way, not sure if you got my reply earlier.
I love you and I hope you'll confide in me later if you want to, it's NEVER too late to call and most definately NEVER a bother.
xxxxxx